RYAN DAVID GINSBERG
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One-Way Friends Suck

2/22/2016

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You know who sucks? Like super sucks? Like sucks so much that you just think to yourself, "Dude, they suck." One way friends, that's who.

What exactly is a "one way friend" you may be wondering? Well allow my genius to be spilled all over your dumb little brain you dumb idiot...I'm sorry, that- that was rude. You're not dumb...I'm just smarter. Much, much smarter....Anyway, a one way friend is a friend who takes much more from the friendship than they ever give. They are the friends who are always around when they need you, but seem to throw on an invisibility cloak and are nowhere to be found when you need them. Harry Potter reference, yo! 

One-wayers are the friends that will come to you and vent for hours and hours and hours, but are unwilling to listen to you talk about your issues for even a few seconds. They are the ones that ask you for favor after favor, but refuse to do any favor for you. They are the ones that only hit you up when they need something, but are never there when you need them. Everybody has at least one of these one way friends... and we all hate them!!

Well, you know what you little one-wayers?? That's not how friendships are supposed to work and us two-wayers won't stand for it any longer! No we will not!

So can we all just be good friends??

In case you you are one of these one-wayers, but want to change and become a two-wayer aka a good friend, then here are a few tips.

Things that make a good friend.
  1. Care about the well being of your friend as much as you care about your own well being.
  2. If you expect a friend to advise you in difficult life conundrums, expect a friend to get you out of a tough situation, or expect them to drop everything to be by your side, then you should be willing to do the exact same for them. Don't expect from others what you are unwilling to do for them.
  3. Be honest with them. This is something that too often goes ignored. It is better to tell somebody the hard truth if it will make them a better person, than it is to ignore it. For instance, if when I send a friend a screenplay of mine to read and review. A bad friend would read it and, even if they hated it, say it is super good and they loved it, thinking that it would be best for my self esteem. A good friend would read it and give me their honest feedback, even if that honest feedback is that they hated it. They would give me their opinion, tell me its flaws, tell me where it falls short. This helps me to become a better writer. If I only listened to the bad friend I would never know how flawed my script actually is. But, with the good friend, I am able to know where I need to make improvements so that I can make the best screenplay. Same goes with all life situations. Don't tell somebody that they are perfect, tell them how they can improve... Obviously, be reasonable in this regard. Don't go around telling somebody that they have an ugly face and be like, "What? I was just being a good friend." I give you all the benefit of the doubt that you are able to make intelligent decisions. Don't prove me wrong.
  4. Don't be jealous of their success. You should enjoy their success as much, if not even more, than they do. You should proudly show off their successes like your mom did that one time you won "Student of the Month" in 5th grade. 
  5. Make them feel as comfortable as possible. A good friend allows you to be your true self around them. They allow you to strip down and be completely vulnerable (metaphorically guys, geez, get your heads out of the gutter.) A good friend doesn't make you feel the need to cover up your scars with makeup...again, metaphorical. Okay, I guess I am no longer giving you the assumption of being intelligent. I apologize. I will go back to that assumption. DON'T PROVE ME WRONG!
  6. Be as present in the downs as you are in the ups. I think this is the most important thing about being a friend. A good friend is by your side even when they have nothing to gain. Even when they know that the rest of the world has blacklisted and quarantined you, they will be right there by your side. In the words of Super Duper Kyle, "Don't try to eat with me now/ You couldn't starve with me then." 
  7. When their world gets dark, be their light.

So there you go. You are now ready to be the best two-way friend in the world.

But if your friend isn't able to reciprocate this. If your friend only takes and never gives. Don't forget that you are allowed to cut people out of your life.

Out with the one-wayers, in with the two-wayers.

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