I feel like Tom, you know the dude from MySpace, was a vicious man with a plan to end all friendships. And how did he plan on doing this? With MySpace's top 8.
I can't even begin to count how many fights were started because I didn't place somebody in this stupid top 8. Everyday at school I would have a new person coming up to me like, "So I noticed I wasn't in your top 8. What's the deal??" "Oh, so um Samuel is higher than me on your top 8?? I've known you for 6 months, you've only known him for 5! What the hell man?" "Oh really, you're gonna put that slut in your top, but not me?? Friendship over!"
It got so bad that an Anchorman type fight began to break out every day at school. You know the fight scene where all the news stations begin an all out brawl! If you haven't seen Anchorman then you can get the hell off of my blog. Like for real. Just leave. And go watch Anchorman. Then come back and read this. Even though Anchorman is completely irrelevant after this sentence.
I was losing friends left and right and up and down and southeast and southwest. Point is, I was losing friends no matter which direction I looked, except for Northwest, those were the loyal homies.
At this point, Tom was sitting on his throne, petting his cat, and laughing his evil, yet so nerdy, laugh. He was watching as the world was literally burning to the ground, And yes that was the correct usage of literally, the world was in real, literal flames! Earth was on the brink of World War 3, and all because of this stupid top 8.
So, I came up with this genius plan that solved everything, for me at least.
I created a page on MySpace and named it "God" and put him as my number 1 friend on MySpace. Nobody could ever argue with me again. I'd just be like, "Sorry bro, I have to put God first. I don't want to like go to hell or anything." And that was it. It stopped all the wars.
So, sorry Tom. But your plan failed.
I don't even know why I wrote this blog, MySpace hasn't been relevant in so long. But, oh well. It's my blog. And I'll write what I want.